Saturday, October 10, 2020

Waves of Grief

sunrise on Mountain Island Lake
For the most part, I think I am still in denial about the fact that my only sister is dead. But for some reason, last Tuesday reality hit me like a tsunami. My husband was out of town, and I woke up very early in the morning. Sensing that additional sleep was out of the question, I made some hot tea, got dressed, and then grabbed my camera to catch the sunrise on the lake. 

I felt my sister's presence as I watched the night turn into day. It was comforting but sad at the same time. I wish that she had gotten the opportunity to come here for a visit as she would have loved sitting and looking at the lake with me. Thanks to COVID, she was not able to do any traveling as she was afraid of contracting the virus.

All day I felt very weepy, though a call from my niece helped as we could talk about the way we are both trying to deal with Kathy's untimely passing. Planting some fall flowers made me feel better, but playing pickleball with my ladies group here in the community was just a bit too overwhelming for me. I left after a few games. Maybe I just felt guilty for living when my sister had her life cut short. 

After I got home, my phone buzzed with a message from one of the sweetest women in my neighborhood. She said she had left something on the porch for me. Opening the door, I found a lovely card and a beautiful plant. She wanted to tell me that she and her husband were thinking about me. I texted her to let her know her timing could not have been more perfect as I had been feeling so down. It was a gentle reminder to me that I should be appreciative and enjoy my time with the living before it is too late.

sympathy greetings from friends

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