Bottoms Up!

Tuesday I had my first North Carolina colonoscopy. Since I have had polyps in the past, I am on the five year plan with the test. Lucky me! I'll admit that this test was a little overdue. As we know, no one loves having this test done.

Suprep

My doctor, like most, wants his patients to do the two-step prep with Suprep. While it has the benefit of drinking less in one sitting, the downside is that you must drink a second bottle. In my case, the second dose was to be taken 6 hours prior to my procedure - so, at 2:15 AM! You combine the 6 ounce Suprep bottle with water or a clear liquid of your choice into the provided 16 ounce cup. Then you must drink two more 16 ounce cups of water in the next hour.

I used Crystal Light Lemonade as my mixture for the first dose at 6:00 PM the night before the procedure, and even having the drink cold and utilizing a straw to bypass some of my taste buds, the concoction was not pleasant to drink. But I got it down, and managed to not throw it back up. One thing that I experienced was extreme coldness once I consumed the product. Even under my electric blanket and covered with quilts, I had uncontrollable shaking for over an hour.

It began working within a half hour, and let's just say I stayed close to the bathroom the rest of the night. Due to this, being awake at 2:15 for the next dose was not a problem. So I repeated the process, and once I was finished with the two additional cups of water at 3:00 AM, I was not allowed to have any more liquids.

We had to be at the endoscopy center by 7:15. Concerned that I might have an accident on the 25 minute drive to the center since I was still experiencing diarrhea, I wore an adult diaper and carried an extra set of clothes. I ended up being able to make it to the bathroom in the center when we arrived, so it was not an issue. But I felt more relaxed knowing I was covered in case it happened.

The staff at the center was great, and the procedure went just fine. Unfortunately the doctor found and removed two polyps, so that keeps me on the five year plan for the test. Hopefully the biopsy reports will come back negative like they did last time. It can take up to a week before I will know.

The test can be life-saving, I'm aware. But I am surprised that they get as many people to complete it as they do because the diet and prep required are literally a pain in the ass. Which makes me wonder - do the gastroenterologists who do colonoscopies tell their friends that all their patients are assholes???