Cruise on Over to the Buffet

The worst thing about a cruise is the buffet. I don't mean the food was bad, I mean the food is bad for you. Despite the fact that we only ate the normal three meals a day, there was nothing normal about how much food I ate. I mean really, as the Cruise Director quipped, "The more you eat, the less the cruise cost you!" It's the mentality you get into - I paid for it, so I have to get my money's worth. It was mentioned that the kitchen prepared 20,000 meals per day on our cruise. Now, math is not my strong suit, but if there were 3,000 passengers on the ship, and let's say 2,000 employees, that should mean 15,000 meals would be required. Who was eating the other 5,000 meals each day? Well, I could pick out some of the people...they were the ones who hailed the elevator to take them up one floor to get to the buffet line. No stairs for them. I gained five pounds on the trip. I wonder what the average weight gain was? Just what I need, five extra pounds right before the holiday heifer-fest begins. I guess the line dance lessons and snorkeling were not enough to offset the extra calories taken in each day. All I have to say is that is was fun putting the pounds on, but it really sucks trying to get them back off.