The Gateway City

St. Louis Arch

Following our Kentucky and Indiana stops, we drove the remaining three hours to St. Louis. Even after all these years, it remains a thrill to catch sight of the Arch as you cross the Mississippi River into Missouri.

The main purpose of our trip was to attend the 30th Anniversary celebration of SWT Design, the company Jim founded with Ted Spaid and Susan Trautman in 1995. What an accomplishment!

But the trip also gave us an opportunity to catch up with friends and family while we were in the area. We were able to see my sister's family, which was great, and Jim got in a bit of motorcycle riding with his friend.

While he was off the first day, I met a girlfriend at the Sophia Sach's Butterfly House. It was a pretty hot day so neither one of us wanted to go on a long walk outside. While the butterfly house is on the warm side, at least you are in the shade. It was great to sit and chat while the butterflies flitted around us. We grabbed lunch after that. 

Butterfly House

The next day while Jim rode, I picked up another friend and she and I went to the Missouri Botanical Garden. I have been to many gardens in my travels around the world, but I have yet to find one that is as wonderful as the one in St. Louis. It is easy to navigate while offering a different visual and sensory experience around every corner. As this particular friend is also a photographer, we were in perfect sync stopping to photograph the flowers and insects around us. When we were finished, we went to the Trainwreck Saloon for lunch. This restaurant is owned by a gal that I worked with at the American Cancer Society from 1980-1982. In all the times I have eaten there, she has never been around. But that Wednesday was my lucky day as Chris was in! We had the best time catching up, and since my lunch friend graduated from the same high school as Chris, they had things to talk about as well.

Missouri Botanical Garden

On Thursday Jim and I spent the day together since the party was later that afternoon. We first went to the St. Louis Zoo. Again, I've gone to a lot of zoos in my lifetime, and none of them compare to this zoo. And it is FREE to get in! SWT Design has done a bit of work in the zoo, so in addition to enjoying the animals it was fun to check up on the progress/maturation of some of their work. The nice, hot day necessitated a stop at Ted Drewes for some frozen custard - always a highlight of a visit to St. Louis.

St. Louis Zoo

That afternoon was the SWT celebration garden party. While it was hot, it was wonderful to catch up with staff members and clients. I don't think Jim and Ted ever anticipated what their dream would one day become. It's a huge milestone to make 30 years in the design field, and to know that their projects have made and are making a lasting impression not only in St. Louis but throughout the country.

Friday was our last day and we began it by playing pickleball in a nearby park with Jim's riding buddy, who has been playing even longer than me. Then the three of us had a late breakfast, and the guys dropped me off at the hotel so they could go pick up the motorcycle trailer. For a few months Jim's motorcycle has been garaged in St. Louis. But it is time for the annual inspection and licensing, so we needed to get it back to Charlotte. It seemed easiest to trailer it back so Jim wouldn't have to make that long bike trip on his own.

Saturday morning we left St. Louis as the sun was rising and made the thirteen hour drive back home. The trailer added time to the trip as we had to stop more often for gas, and be a little more cautious when driving through the mountains. So we saw the sun rise and the sun set, but made it safely back here.

sunrise, sunset

 

Kentucky Whisky

A couple weeks ago we drove up to St. Louis to see friends and family. As it is a long drive, we stopped in Loretto, Kentucky so we could experience the Maker's Mark Distillery tour. There's a bit of a connection between Loretto and Webster Groves, the St. Louis suburb that we lived in before moving to North Carolina.

Loretto is known as the national home of the Sisters of Loretto, which were founded in 1812 to provide education and serve the community. The early nuns enlisted the aid of Father Charles Nerinckx, the Flemish missionary priest who served the area, to help them establish their community. We visited the Loretto campus, and saw the sign for a road named Nerinx. 

Sisters of Loretto

In Webster Groves, very near where we lived, is a girl's Catholic school called Nerinx Hall. It was founded in 1924 following the Loretto values, and the name is a tribute to Reverend Charles Nerinckx of Kentucky. Also nearby is Webster University, which was founded in 1915 by the Sisters of Loretto as Loretto College. It was one of the first women's colleges west of the Mississippi River.

In Loretto we stayed at the Hill House Bed & Breakfast, a home that was built in 1863. We had a lovely stay there, and the hosts recommended that we head to Yellowstone Bourbon for a free flight of whisky. As I am not a whisky fan (and felt bad about only getting a free flight with our coupon) I ordered a gin Old Fashioned. It was tasty!

Yellowstone Bourbon

Following a delicious breakfast at the B & B, we drove the few miles down the road to Maker's Mark. The campus, also known as Star Hill Farms, is approximately 1,100 acres. Our tour began at 11:00 and lasted an hour and a half. The tour guide provided a lot of interesting information about the history of Maker's Mark and the process they use to make, bottle, label, seal and ship their whisky. An added bonus for us was the Chihuly glass exhibit that is taking place this year. After the tour we made our way to Huntingburg, Indiana, where we spent the night at our daughter-in-law's parent's house. They are right on the way to St. Louis, so it was great to be able to catch up with them for a bit. 

Maker's Mark Distillery

Stolen Rental Car Part Two

With the warning that I needed to be at the airport really early in order to try and get clearance to fly without any identification, we were dropped off at Lambert St. Louis International Airport three hours before our flight. We first stopped at the American counter, where you normally have to show your driver's license to get your boarding pass. It helped, I think, that I had a credit card with my name on it as it had been in the gas pump when the car was stolen. The desk agent printed out my boarding pass, as well as Jim's, and directed us to TSA downstairs. 

When we got to the TSA agent, I explained that my rental car had been stolen, along with my purse, ID, and all my luggage. He asked if I had a piece of mail on me. Really? I said I had nothing but my credit card. At that point he called for another TSA agent, and had us stand off to the side. A female agent came to get me, and told Jim he had to go on through the checkpoint as he normally would. She took me to a separate desk, where she proceeded to ask me a bunch of questions. Then she said she had to call someone else (Homeland Security?), and explained that they would ask me a series of questions. She said I would only have one try to answer them correctly. Okay, no pressure... I guess I did okay, but then she took my new phone, my credit card, and one of my shoes for a special test. I went through the security line, and got some extra patting down. All that was just fine with me, and I was able to board and go home. I do have global entry status, and I'm wondering if that helped. 

Our neighbor picked us up at the airport in Charlotte, and while driving home we noticed that both Jim and I had a bunch of "No Name" calls on our phones. When he got one that said Creve Coeur, he answered in case it was something to do with the car. It turned out to be a north county police officer who was looking for me. I took the call, and it ends up he had found my suitcase and my iPad. He had gone to the parking lot of an apartment complex to arrest a suspect in a different car theft. When he got out of his car, he saw a transponder laying in the lot. His first thought was that it had been pulled out of a rental car, so he started searching the area. Thats when he found my suitcase and the luggage tag nearby that they had torn off. He also found the iPad, which he opened up. He saw a message from someone asking if I got home okay. He just asked me to describe the iPad, which I could as it has a case on it.

He told me I needed to pick up my stuff by 7:00 that day as that is when his shift ended. If I didn't come and get it, it would be boxed up and taken to the central headquarters in Clayton, and it would be harder for me to retrieve. I explained that I was back in Charlotte, but would see if a friend could come and get it. I admit that I was surprised they didn't want to dust the items for fingerprints, but maybe I've watched too much crime t.v. My friend was able to go and collect my stuff, and we did a FaceTime call when he got back to his house and opened up the suitcase. It was obvious that they had gone through everything as my packing cubes were all emptied out. Some items (like the iPad and my pickleball paddle) had been in the backpack, but the paddle was now in the suitcase. My friend shipped the suitcase and iPad to me the next day.

When I received my stuff, the suitcase was all muddy but in good working condition. As I went through everything, I realized that the packing cube with my dirty laundry in it was missing. So I didn't get back some pickleball clothes, underwear, shorts and shirts. Also out of my makeup bag they took my mascara, nail clippers and tweezers. The backpack, which has not been found, contained ear buds, my purse, charging cords for all my devices, sports glasses and a pair of sandals. 

The thieves managed to use my debit card (even though they didn't have the PIN number) five times before the bank shut my card down. They used it immediately after the theft of the car, so before I was able to finally get to a phone to call and cancel the card. My bank's fraud department is taking care of the charges. I called the police department where the car had been stolen and told them the addresses where my air pods and phone were located, and also where the debit card had been used. I talked to a detective (not the responding cop), and he said the debit card locations would be very helpful. And I said yes, especially if they can match the description with my eyewitness. He said, "You had an eyewitness?" And I told him about the lady on the motorcycle. I said she couldn't hang around and wait for the police as they were trying to outrun the rain from the hurricane, but she gave us her card. He asked if I gave it to the cop, and I said we tried to but he said he didn't need it as he would review the surveillance tape. Which then made me ask the detective if they had seen the tape? He said there was no record of it, so I was sure it was long erased by then. While I had him on the phone, I told him I had left two messages with his department requesting the police report. I need it for insurance purposes. He said it would be 7-10 days before it would be available. He did take down the names and numbers of the two people who had been filling up the same time as me.

In reviewing our documents, I found that the credit card I used to pay for the car rental covers damage as well as theft of rental cars. I have rental car coverage on my automobile policy, but I decided to file the claim through the credit card company instead. Virginia Surety handles these claims, and they need a copy of the police report and rental agreement to process the claim. I also filled out on online claim form with Budget to cover all my bases with them. They, too need a copy of the police report.

Little did I know how problematic it would be to get a police report or a rental agreement. Stay tuned...

Stolen Rental Car

Toyota Camry

My flight back to Charlotte from St. Louis was scheduled in the early afternoon of September 28th. I left my friend's house at 9:45, and drove my Toyota Camry rental car to a Phillip 66 gas station that was located near the rental return area across from Lambert St. Louis International Airport. I pulled up to the front pump, exited the car and inserted my credit card into the pump, which was on the driver's side of the car. There was a man at the pump next to me, and a man and a woman on motorcycles at the pump behind me. It was 10:30 on a Saturday morning.

I had just unscrewed the gas cap and was looking to see if the car had a place to store it while filling up, and the lady with the motorcycle started yelling. I looked at her to see what was wrong, and she said, "Your car! Your car!" I turned back around and saw my car moving. My first thought was that I had forgotten to put it in park. But then the car sped up and pealed around the back of the station. The woman yelled that the guy who took my car had gotten out of a black car, which I saw going out the opposite exit of the gas station. The black car had no markings or license plate on it. Apparently the thief got out of the black car, crouched down low and climbed into the passenger door, then scrambled over the center console to get to the driver's seat. I had not unlocked the passenger door that day, and apparently the car did not have the safety feature of only unlocking the driver's door when the button is pushed on the key fob. My own car automatically does that, so it didn't occur to me to check the other door when I got out.

To say that I was stunned is a vast understatement. I just could not comprehend what had just happened. My phone was in the car, and I keep my driver's license, insurance card and debit card in the phone case. And of course my suitcase and backpack were in the vehicle since I was on my way to the airport.

I dashed into the station and asked the clerk to call the police because my car had just been stolen. He said he didn't know the phone number. Really? It's 911, I told him. Then he said he had to call his manager to get the number. If he wasn't in on this whole deal, I'd be greatly surprised. While waiting for him, the man at the next pump came in. I'll refer to him as John, though I know his real name. He gave me his phone so that I could call Budget to let them know about the car. I explained to the lady who answered the phone that my car had just been stolen. She asked me for the license number. Again, really? I said the car is gone, I don't know the license number. Then she wanted my reservation number. Hello, my phone is gone along with the car so I can't look that up! I suggested she just look up my rental agreement with my name. By then the police had shown up, and I said to the woman, "You have a transponder on that car, can't you tell the police where it is right now?" She told me that I needed to just calm down. Hmmm...I handed her over to the policeman so he could give her his information.

John let me use his phone to call my husband, who was off on a motorcycle trip with his friend somewhere in the middle of Missouri. His plan was to fly home on the following Wednesday. I knew Jim wouldn't answer a call from an unknown number, so I left a message. Fortuitously, he and his friend had just stopped for a break so he actually listened to the voicemail right away. He said they would head back to St. Louis immediately.

In the meantime, John tried to give the policeman the business card from the eyewitness (woman on the motorcycle saw it all), and he said he didn't need it as he would review the surveillance tape. He never interviewed me to see what happened or what I had in the car, or John to see what he knew. He did say that four cars a week (!) get stolen from that gas station as well as the QT down the street. He was very matter of fact about it. He said they were going to go down the road, throw my stuff out the window, and use the car for other mischief.

The cop then asked where I wanted him to take me because "ma'am, it isn't safe for you here." He wanted to take me back to Budget and when I asked why he said so I could rent another car. I reminded him that I was on the way to return the car so I could fly home. And he said you aren't going home today with no ID. The cop gave me his name, badge number, and case number, and then he and the other two cops took off.

I was at a loss as to what to do or where to go. I don't have any phone numbers memorized (except my husband's) since they are stored in my phone, and I couldn't even come up with anyone's address. My new friend John (who is a professional driver) said he would take me where I needed to go. I didn't know the address of where my husband would ultimately show up, but I could direct John on how to get there.

John was a rock for me, and somewhat restored my faith in humanity. His wife made some calls to see how I could go about flying with no ID. She found some helpful information. When we got to our friend's, I had no way to pay him for all of his help and kindness. But I got his address so I could mail him a thank you gift.

Once inside our friend's house I used their phone to cancel my debit card and talk to the airline. My ticket allowed for no changes, and while they were sympathetic they would not budge on giving me a credit for the flight. Once Jim got there we went to the Apple store to replace my phone. While the employee was able to get me set up with my Verizon service, we could not transfer anything over to my new phone because I couldn't sign into my iCloud account. Where is my password stored? On the stolen phone. Luckily I had my phone passcode protected, so the thieves couldn't get into it and it no longer had any cell service on it once I transferred to the new phone. And with the new phone, the police could get in contact with me if need be.

We had to cancel Jim's flight for Wednesday, and again lost that money. We booked both of us to fly home the next day. That night I slept in a shirt I borrowed from Jim as all I had were the clothes on my back. Sunday at the airport I found out it is possible to fly without an ID. More in my next post...

You Can Go Home Again - But You Might Not Want to

Last month we went back to St. Louis to visit friends and family. We also made sure to hit some of our favorite food and tourist attractions. For the first part of the trip, Jim and I were together for the food and attractions. Our first stop after picking up the rental car was Imo's Pizza, and we hit the one near our old house since it was too early to check in to our hotel. After eating, we stopped by Jim's old business, SWT Design, to say hello to some folks. Then we drove by the house that had been our home for 32 years. It was so nice to see that the new owners are taking good care of the 1902 beauty.

Imo's & Favazza's

That night we had dinner with Jim's former business partner and his wife at Favazza's, which is our favorite Italian restaurant in St. Louis. The next day we visited the Missouri Botanical Garden, Merb's Candies, Dad's  Cookie Company, and Ted Drewe's. We were saddened to hear that Ted had died the previous month. He was quite an institution in the area! We had dinner with another couple that night.

MoBot, Merb's, Dad's, & Drewe's

The rest of our time together passed quickly, with stops at the Missouri History Museum to see the World's Fair exhibit, looking at new SWT projects in the area, and finding a nice spot for a sunset. It was also great to see my sisters family for just the second time since she passed in 2020. We, of course, managed to get in a little pickleball as well.

Missouri History Museum, Creve Coeur Lake, MO Pickleball Club

Jim then met up with his motorcycle riding buddy, and they took off south for a few days ride. I drove out to my friend Diane's to stay with her for a bit. She has a new house out in the O'Fallon area, and it was fun to see her place. We spent time eating, walking, going to parks, and checking out the Rawlings baseball museum in Westport.

fun adventures

The fun times were somewhat marred by Hurricane Helene, which somehow managed to swing up and around to North Carolina. With all the rain, Duke Energy had to release water from the Lake Norman dam, which then flooded our lake and subsequently the lake below us. Our community was without power for about 30 hours, so of course food spoilage was a big concern. Our area was very lucky compared to what went on in the mountain region of North Carolina, however. It will take years to recover there.

My flight to come home was on September 28th, while Jim was scheduled to come back on October 2nd. But something happened to my rental car on the 28th that messed up all those plans. And it is why I may not want to go home again. I'll write about that in my next post.

Happy Anniversary Baby

wedding anniversary

Friday was our 44th wedding anniversary. It's hard to wrap my head around that. We met at Iowa State University when we were 18 years old, and started dating a few months later. We married shortly after graduation, and relocated to St. Louis where Jim had secured a job. In St. Louis we completed master's degrees, raised a family and built a good life.

When we retired to the Charlotte area nearly three years ago, we didn't know anyone or much about the area. It was a huge leap of faith to come here, and only a strong marriage could survive the stress and upheaval of the massive move. During one of our three years here we buried both Jim's mom and dad, and my beloved sister. Having someone to share the grieving process with made all the difference in the world in how we coped with the huge losses.

The support network within our new community is phenomenal as well. Because we are in a 55+ community, we have experienced many deaths already. But I think most of us moved here in the hopes that the community will wrap us in a loving embrace when we experience a severe health issue or death in our family. That has certainly proven to be true so far. I am confident that when something happens to me or Jim, our neighbors will rally around the survivor. And the community will share in the grieving process.

Getting back to our anniversary, we didn't do a lot to celebrate this year, save for going out for a meal at one of our favorite restaurants. It offers waterside dining, so we always know we can sit outside. But as next year will be the 45th anniversary, we are already thinking of something big to do in honor of that occasion. We are both eager to cruise again, but there are still so many people getting Covid on the ships that it just doesn't seem worth the risk yet. Maybe by next summer it will be more under control. Who can say?

Floating Away

We have just returned from a road trip to St. Louis. Because it takes more than 12 hours to get there, we decided to spend the night in Frankfurt, Kentucky on July 8th. There are a number of whisky distilleries in the area, and we wanted to check out a couple of them. I don't like whisky or bourbon myself, but several of the distilleries have historic buildings and/or beautiful grounds and I'm always up for a photo adventure. This would be our third attempt at doing this as each previous try resulted in a rainout. As (bad) luck would have it, we were rained out this trip as well. 

Trying to make the best of the situation, there was enough of a break that we were able to check out the Josephine Sculpture Park on the night of arrival. The tagline for the park is "where art meets the earth", and you can view nearly 70 sculptures on their 30 acres of land. The park is free and open to the public, and we enjoyed the wildflowers as much as the pieces of art.

Josephine Sculpture Park

On Saturday we finished our drive to St. Louis. We spent the first two nights in a hotel so that we could have the flexibility to come and go as we pleased. We had dinner that night with our good friend Diane, and it was great to catch up with her. Sunday morning we went to the Missouri Botanical Garden, which is one of my favorite spots in all of the United States. They are in the middle of a large construction project, adding a new entrance, events space and enlarged gift shop. That was followed by a stop at the ever-beautiful Forest Park, and lunch at Imo's Pizza. We were blessed with a beautiful morning, with lower temperatures and humidity. Later in the day we visited with my late sister's family, whom we had not seen since her funeral. It was nice to see them under happier circumstances.

Missouri Botanical Garden

Forest Park and the City Foundry

Monday we picked up a friend of ours and went to check out some new developments (at least new to us) in St. Louis. One of the areas was the City Foundry, Once housing the Century Electric Company, the 15-acre site is now home to businesses, a large food court, and an entertainment hall. From there we went to Union Station to see the St. Louis Wheel (a large ferris wheel) and take a peak at the St. Louis Aquarium. It's always fun for me to go to Union Station as my dad took the train in and out of St. Louis when he was stationed at Jefferson Barracks during WWII. It was nice to see the station bustling even though it was a Monday afternoon.

City Foundry & Union Station

The rest of the week was filled with playing pickleball with some of my lady friends, visiting my long-time hair stylist for a cut and lunch, and a Cardinals baseball game followed by a stop at Ted Drews for some frozen custard Friday we drove 3 hours south to a campground to join the SWT team for their annual float trip. This year it took place on the Gasconade River, which I had not floated on before. Despite the high temperatures (98 degrees on Saturday), we had a fun time and it was great to see everyone again.

rain delay

On Monday we left St. Louis at 6:45 a.m. to drive home. We decided to drive straight through, and it was a challenge. The day began with fog in Illinois, then we had heavy rains in Kentucky, Tennessee and North Carolina. A stalled car on eastbound I-40 and a bad accident on westbound I-40 led to numerous delays. It took us over 13 1/2 hours to get home. I'm ready to stay put for awhile.

Snow Day

snow day

We are in our third winter at our new home in the Charlotte, North Carolina area. We experienced our first snow on Sunday. Or maybe I should say our first snice storm. It began as snow and then turned into freezing rain and sleet. I was hoping we had left this weather behind in St. Louis, but apparently not. I would rather have a bunch of snow than ice, that's for sure. We didn't have anywhere to go and our freezer and pantry were well-stocked, so we just prayed that the ice wouldn't cause a limb to fall on a transformer.

We dodged a bullet this time, but more rain followed by snow are on tap for Thursday and Friday. Yippee!

Happy 4th of July

 

St. Louis Arch

Finding Fall

 

maples in St. Louis

One of the things I miss about living in the Midwest is the incredible fall foliage we experienced. Even walking around our neighborhood you could see a burst of colors from red, to orange to yellow. We moved during the fall last year, and the colors were poor to say the least. North Carolina had been in a drought, so that impacted the changing leaves. Even a drive to the higher elevations did not result in any pretty colors to photograph.

Tuesday we decided to see what colors were happening in the Beech Mountain area, which is about a two and a half hour drive from here. The colors were fairly vibrant, but mostly yellows. I guess that there are not too many maples in North Carolina. I want to research that a bit, as I would like to plant a couple in our yard if they can grow okay here.

At any rate, it was a pretty day for a drive. It looks like COVID will limit our travel for the foreseeable future. Our coronacations will consist of local drives for the most part. Luckily, our location is great for making day trips to see the beauty of this state.

leaf peepers

One year ago today we signed the closing papers on our new home on Mountain Island Lake. I have not regretted for one moment our decision to make the momentous move from the city that had been our home for our entire 41 years of married life to a place where we knew no one. It has been an incredible journey!

signing the papers

Lemons to Lemonade

 While we could never had anticipated that our first visit back to St. Louis following our move to North Carolina 11 months earlier would be to attend my sister's funeral, we decided to make the most out of a horrific situation. While the kids and my niece were still with us we ate our favorite local foods and on Friday the 18th visited the St. Louis Zoo as well as Forest Park. It was a beautiful day, and most people were socially responsible and wore masks even though we were outside. The masks were required by the zoo, but of course there was one family of four who didn't think the mandate applied to them. It took everything I had not to call them out on it. If they have health concerns that prohibit them from wearing a mask, then they sure as heck should not be out in a public place where they might catch something! Other than that, our visit was fun and uneventful.

St. Louis Zoo

Saturday morning we made a nice breakfast for everyone before Andy and Megan needed to leave for the airport. Then we took Katie and Sara downtown to see City Garden and the new museum under the Arch. We had a late lunch at Ballpark Village before we needed to take Sara to the airport.

downtown St. Louis

Sunday morning we had our last breakfast at the AirBNB, and then headed to the Missouri Botanical Garden. Advanced ticket purchases were required as they are limiting the number of people who can go in the garden. Katie, Jim and I had a wonderful time getting some exercise and admiring all the flowers. I have to say that one thing we miss in our part of North Carolina is all the flowering shrubs and flowers that were in abundance in St. Louis. We followed that with a late lunch before heading over to my friend Diane's house to unload the car as we were spending the next few days with her. We had a couple of hours to pass before Katie needed to be taken to the airport.

Missouri Botanical Garden

The remainder of our stay in St. Louis was spent visiting old friends. I was especially excited to be able to play pickleball with the two different groups of ladies I had played with for years. Jim was able to play with his friends as well, and even squeezed in a short motorcycle ride with his best friend.

The trip was bittersweet, and proved you can indeed go home again. But it's not the same, and helped to confirm that moving to our community in North Carolina was a great decision for us.

September sunset at home

Saying Goodbye to My Sister

 My only sister Kathy died very unexpectedly of a massive heart attack on September 11th. She was only 76 - much too young to die. While I deeply regret that she was taken from us at such an early age, I will be forever grateful that as far as we know she did not suffer. 

There was no question regarding whether or not we would attend the funeral, COVID or no COVID. Jim and I drove from Mount Holly as far as Paducah, KY on September 15th. There we spent the night at my request. Kathy and I had always talked about going there to see the National Quilt Museum as quilting was a hobby we both shared. On the morning of September 16th, Jim and I went through the museum in Kathy's memory. How she would have loved to see the vast variety of quilting styles! While totally different from the way that she and I quilted, they were works of art to behold.

National Quilt Museum

The next morning we drove the last four hours to St. Louis. Of course we had to drive by our old house and check it out. It looks like the new owners are taking good care of it, though the large oak tree on the north side of the house has died of old age. That will be expensive to remove, and we were thankful that it wasn't an expense we would have to undertake. Then we went to our old grocery store to pick up provisions for a few days. I rented a two flat house in the south city area for our family of six adults. Our kids were coming into town that night, and my niece Sara flew in from Texas in the afternoon. I wanted all of us in the same spot so we could spend time together. It ended up working out very well as each flat had two bedrooms, a bathroom, kitchen and living room.

Thursday the funeral home held a viewing for the family from 9-10 and then for friends from 10-12:30, with the funeral following at Immaculate Conception Catholic Church at 1:00. Up to that point, Kathy's death had seemed surreal. All that changed when faced with seeing her in a coffin. It was so hard to experience the grief of her husband and children while at the same time trying to get a handle on my own. I know our kids struggled as well since Kathy had been way more than an aunt to her. Our own mother died when Andy was only 4, so Kathy became a surrogate grandmother to him and later on to Katie as well.

The funeral was very personal as the priest knew Kathy well due to her attendance at Mass (even virtually when COVID hit) as well as her participation in the Daughters of Isabella (D of I) at the parish. Nearly everyone wore a mask in church, as they had in the funeral home, and we were spaced out in every other pew. Following the service the D of I ladies held a luncheon for the family in the Knights of Columbus hall. My sister was to be buried at Jefferson Barracks Cemetery since her husband had served in the Navy. But cemetery regulations right now are not allowing any graveside services, so we went back to the AirBNB after the luncheon. Several family members came over later, and we played a rousing game of Yahtzee in Kathy's memory. It was her favorite game, and she nearly always was the winner. It seemed a fitting end to a day filled with grief, tears, laughter and shared memories.

Kathy & me

House for Sale

In anticipation of putting our house on the market, we began the process of purging months ago. Three truckloads of items have been picked up by various charitable organizations, our trash cans and recycling containers are consistently full each week, and many other items have been re-gifted to others. Let alone being married for 41 years, we have lived in the same house for 32 years! That is a long time to accumulate junk as well as treasures.

At first it was difficult for us to let some things go, but this has gotten much easier as time has passed. The reality of moving to a new home that has no basement or attic storage, and is 1000 square feet smaller to boot, has sunk in. We simply can't take it all with us.

Our realtor was upfront in telling us that this new group of house hunters does not want to feel as if they have walked into "grandma's house". Ouch! The quilts on the wall must go! Grandma's handmade doilies must go! The antiques should go, if possible. She suggested that any items we didn't plan on taking with us be removed from the house before listing. We took her at her word, and as we had no plans to fill a brand-spanking new home with antiques, we got rid of the antiques except for two heirlooms. We found an auction house who would come and pick up the items and then sell them at auction. They were all removed Mother's Day weekend.

What that means is that we have nothing in the dining room, and no dressers in any of the rooms. So where do we put our underwear??? As my husband says, it looks like a monastery around here. We each have a nightstand for socks and underwear, and a plastic bin under the bed for shorts and t-shirts. It has been interesting to see how little clothing we really need.

We found a couple who are on a mission to place as many free libraries as they possibly can in rural Missouri, so they were thrilled to take a dozen or so boxes of books off our hands. Another lady was happy to get a twin mattress for an AirBNB she was setting up.

We had set aside multiple bins of toys for our kids to go through, which they did the beginning of July when they came to St. Louis for a final visit of their childhood home. Whatever they didn't want was then taken to the Salvation Army. Our son had driven his pickup truck here so that he could take a chest of drawers that once belonged to his great-great-grandparents, so he had room to take some of the teak outdoor furniture as well. He looked like the Beverly Hillbillies when he left here. We will store a couple bins for our daughter as she had no way to take them back on the plane.

We know that we have to weed out more items, and we have hundreds of record albums to take to a record store and some collectibles that need to go on an auction site. But I'm incredibly proud that we have made so much progress. The house is on the market, and looking better than ever before. It's almost too nice to leave. Almost... Now if we can just get around the HGTV mentality where all the buyers expect to have the entire house in perfect condition with everything they desire in it, but without a large price tag attached.

On Retirement

My husband retired a couple of months ago after selling his portion of a design firm that he and his business partner had developed 20+ years ago. While he will remain on in an advisory role for 12 months, for all intents and purposes he is done working.  I have not worked in corporate America since 1997, though I did contribute to our organics company until we sold that several years ago. Since then I have been writing and doing photography, so I have been working out of our home for many years.

We knew that we would not want to stay in our 2 1/2 story Queen Ann-style home for much longer, so last year we began to talk about where we would want to move. We could stay in St. Louis, of course. But a lot of the work involved in moving would take place whether we moved a mile or thousands of miles away. That thought process opened up all kinds of opportunities to us.

When we moved to St. Louis in 1978 with our fresh college diplomas in hand, we thought we would be here for a couple of years and then would move on. Yet here we are, 42 years later. St. Louis has been very good to us, and was a wonderful place to raise our children. But they don't live here any more. We have got one on each coast of this vast country.

As we started discussing where we might like to live, several things became clear. First of all, the benefit of being with the same person for over four decades is that you do tend to think alike. We both wanted a location that has all four seasons - just a little less of the winter season. That automatically ruled out a number of retirement spots such as Arizona and Florida. We have zero interest in owning and maintaining two separate residences. Neither of us wants to live any further north than where we are, or to spend way too much of our retirement savings in expensive cities like Washington, DC (where our son and daughter-in-law live) or Los Angeles (where our daughter lives.) Being adverse to worrying about our house being demolished in a hurricane, the coastal United States was off the consideration table as well. That still left a lot of options to examine.

view from the community center

North Carolina made the top of our list due to its natural beauty. We had visited the state and loved it. It also seemed that anytime we wanted to fly somewhere out of St. Louis we had to go through Charlotte to get where we were going.

We thought we found the perfect place in a community called The Coves. Located in northwestern North Carolina equal distance between Charlotte and Asheville, the development would allow us to buy as many acres as we would like and to build a custom home. With 3,600 acres of land, it offered a community center, hiking trails, a riding stable, a vineyard and community garden, rivers, waterfalls and miles of hiking trails. On paper it looked perfect. For a number of reasons, it was not right for us once we visited in June of 2018 even though the mountain views were quite pretty. On that trip we looked at a several places in central North Carolina as well as the Charlotte area and didn't fall in love with any of them. We were back to square one.

After talking with a number of my pickleball friends who either travel extensively or own second residences, we began to think for the first time about 55+ active adult communities. In a million years, we never thought we would even consider such a concept. But the more we read about them, the more intrigued we became. People are drawn to them because they want to make new friends, have a variety of activities available, have their yard maintained, and be able to "lock and leave", knowing their home will be safe and looked after when they travel.

I decided to give the Charlotte area another shot due to its great international airport and good health care reports. Did you know that Charlotte has 38 of these kind of communities? Holy smokes! That says something about the area to me. I could eliminate a lot of them because they were too large or too small, or they focused on an amenity (like golf) that was not important to us. I was left with a list of 6 or 7. Through my search I found Roger Holloway, the YouTube star of 55+ communities in the Charlotte area. I reached out to Roger, who is a buyers agent, and we set up a time to go to Charlotte and see some of the communities. That happened in February of 2019, prior to our Southern Caribbean cruise out of Fort Lauderdale (because yes, we had to fly though Charlotte to get there from St. Louis.)

We were very impressed with the design and amenities of the Trilogy development, which is about 50% built out. All the people we met were friendly and gracious, and the community center and gathering spaces were incredible. The only problem was that the most desirable (in our opinion) lots were already taken. We were not interested in a lot that backs to a retaining wall, or the neighbors screened in porch.

Imagery by Lennar

Then we went to see Imagery by Lennar. It is the only community that is built on a lake - Mountain Island Lake, to be specific. So new that there were not even models built that we could take a look at, this 320 acre development is being constructed on land once owned by the Bechtler family, for whom the art museum in Charlotte is named. They had a home on the land as well as 6 or so large cabins, where visiting artists could live in residence while creating their art. When the Bechtler's sold the land, a commitment was made by Lennar to keep the "artistic" feel of the property, including the house and cabins which will become activity centers for the new community. While it is a little hard for some people, me included, to visualize what the community will become, fortunately Lennar has a similar community nearby that we could visit. Tree Tops is not located in a lake, but it gave us a good sense of what Lennar is going for in the new development.

As it is so new, lake view lots are available. Well, once you see that you cannot unsee it. We knew we would not be happy in a home that did not offer us a view of the lake from our own property. We just were not sure that we wanted to live through the pains (and noise) of a construction zone for quite some time. We headed off to our cruise, enjoyed going over all the pros and cons with our friends on the trip, and came back to St. Louis to think some more.

proud owners of Lot 33

After a couple of weeks we decided to make an offer on a lot and one of the house plans that was available to go on it. Following a little back and forth, we came to a mutually acceptable price. And just like that we were landowners - in a new land. With these communities, you must have them begin construction pretty much right away. While that pushed us some, we like the fact that people aren't buying lots and then just letting them sit, which is pretty much what is going on at The Coves. With a construction timetable of 5 months, we selected a closing date of October 31. Happy Halloween!

We quickly kicked into purging mode here on the home front. It has been a dirty, challenging, frustrating, and somewhat freeing process. The unusable has gone in the trash or recycling bins, but three truckloads have been picked up by the Salvation Army and a couple of other loads delivered by us in our pickup to their store. We will have at least one more load before it is all said and done.

The toys and games of our children were boxed up separately for them to review. They both came home recently and went through the boxes. Andy took what he wanted back to DC in his pickup, and Katie has 2 plastic bins that we will take with us and store for her. Her apartment in Los Angeles has no storage space, and she couldn't have taken them on the plane anyway. The remaining toys were taken to a charity.

I've also had some fun with a Facebook group called Webster Groves Buys Nothing. Local residents are always putting out a call for something they are looking for, such as the original "Home Alone" on VHS which I gladly re-gifted. On the opposite end, people like me are getting rid of things, so a simple photo on the site usually results in multiple people vying for the free item. It is fun to see that others will enjoy things that we no longer want.

Less fun has been getting the house ready to go on the market. More on that in my next post.

Snow Day

Muny bandstand

Between Friday, January 11th and Saturday, January 12th, St. Louis got dumped on - literally! We had over 11 inches of snow at our house. Fortunately I had prepared, so we had plenty of groceries and no place we need to be. Many other people were not so lucky. There were reports of hundreds of motorists stranded in their cars overnight due to impassable interstates and/or accidents. I cannot ever remember hearing of such a thing in the past, even when we had more significant snowfall.

By Sunday the additional predicted snow had skirted past us, and the roads were in fairly good shape. We decided to head out to Forest Park and the famed Art Hill, where sledding is a contact sport whenever it snows. We wanted to take some pictures for Week 2 of the photography challenge we are participating in, and moving targets on the hill would fit the bill.

It was fun to watch all the people, and listen to the screams of glee as children flew down the hill. The slight warming of temperature and the volume of folks going sledding made the slope very fast. Once we were done taking pictures, we couldn't resist a few runs down the hill ourselves. We had drug the old plastic sleds out of our storage shed and brought them along in case we were compelled to go down. I'm so glad we did. What fun we had! Though we may have been the oldest people taking part that afternoon, it goes to show you that age is just a number. Who said we have to act our age?

Art Hill, Forest Park

Fall Photo Shoot

Fall finally arrived in our area, so last Saturday Jim and I along with another photographer friend went out to shoot some fall color. We started at Forest Park, intending to drive through looking for inspiration. What we didn't know was that there was a huge run taking place that morning. Parking and traffic were quite a mess, but we finally found a spot near our intended location at the Muny. The lake and bandstand outside our outdoor theater never disappoints in any season, but it is bathed in brilliance in the fall. This year was no exception.

The Muny at Forest Park

From there we made our way over to the zoo, which is also located within Forest Park. Despite the overcast skies and cooler temperature, the zoo was actually fairly crowded. Many of the animals were out, though we were not lucky enough to get close to the new cheetah family. In November of 2017, the female cheetah gave birth to eight cubs, a first in zoo history. The normal size of a litter is four. The cubs were kept out of the public eye until May of this year, but sightings of them are still pretty rare. Here are some of the other animals we saw though.

St. Louis Zoo

While walking back to the car, we stopped to admire the trees around Art Hill. The colors were outstanding, and there were many people taking advantage of the beauty to capture family photos. I really enjoy our photo walk outings, and the opportunity to be outside taking pictures with other people who get my obsession.

Art Hill in Forest Park

Summer Celebrations

As we have rolled into July, I've been able to get out a bit and do my favorite pastime - taking photographs. Jim and I, along with another photographer friend, have gone out several times together in the last year or so to take pictures. Then after a couple of days, we share our favorite photo from the outing with each other. It is always fun to see our different perspectives, even though we were in the same area together. This month we went to the Columbia Bottom Conservation Area in north St. Louis County.

Located at the confluence of the Missouri and Mississippi Rivers, Columbia Bottom has over 4,000 acres of land to explore by car, bikes or walking. They also have an area to put in boats, and I have seen people coming there to fish as well. The conservation department has planted fields of sunflowers, so that was the draw for us on this trip. Four fields were in bloom, and they have staggered the plantings so that there should be flowers in bloom through August. Though I wish we had arrived earlier than 9:00 as it was already hot and humid, the sunflowers were amazing.

Columbia Bottom Conservation Area

We also attended the Webster Groves 4th of July parade, which is a time-honored tradition for us. We simply have to pack up our chairs and water bottles and walk over two streets to the parade route. After years of practice, we know where to set up our chairs so that we will be in the shade the entire time. Jim set our chairs up early, and we walked over around 9:15. The parade starts at 10:00 and it takes a good half hour to reach our spot. But the time passes quickly talking to the folks around us and people watching. Despite all the political entries in the parade, I thought it was a good one and that people were very respectful.

Webster Groves parade

On Friday, July 6th we had a nice treat. An architectural firm that Jim works with, Fox Architects, was celebrating their 40th anniversary with a party at their office. It happens to be located directly across the street from the St. Louis Arch, the grounds of which have been newly renovated. For the first time in several years they were able to have Fair St. Louis back on the arch grounds now that construction is complete. We had a bird's eye view from the 18th floor of the One Memorial Drive building, high above the crowds and an exceptional spot to watch the fireworks display. It was a great time!

St. Louis Arch

Shine on, St. Louis!

St. Louis Arch

The redevelopment of the Arch grounds has been going on for quite some time - years, in fact. It was supposed to be completed by the 50th anniversary of the opening of the Arch, which was to be celebrated October 28, 2015. Oops...But great progress has been made, and the area looks really good right now. Pedestrian access is much improved, with people able to enter the park without having to cross multiple lanes of traffic. The museum is not yet open, with the latest prediction stating that it will be ready for visitors "in the summer of 2018".

Jim and I went downtown Saturday morning to check things out. We began at Citygarden, a lovely small park that opened in 2009. With its water features, it is packed with families in the summer looking for a spot to cool off during the intense heat that is prevalent here.

Citygarden

statue depicting Harry Kiener

Next we walked to Kiener Plaza. Dedicated in 1962, the park was named after Harry Kiener, a local amateur boxer, wrestler and swimmer who also was part of the U.S. track team at the Olympics held in St. Louis in 1904. The plaza recently underwent extensive renovations, and reopened in May of 2017. The new design is wildly successful, and includes a children's playground. There must have been 75 people taking part in a yoga class Saturday morning.

From there we headed to the Arch, stopping to admire the wonderful gardens that serve as the front yard to the old courthouse. It was great to see so many people out and about in the city, especially considering that it is not yet summer and no Cardinals game was being played. St. Louis gets such a bad rap in the media due to the way the crime statistics are tabulated. It makes me happy to see people enjoying the beautiful amenities our city has to offer. Shine on, St. Louis!

St. Louis City

Hip Hop Hamilton

Hamilton

Unless you have been living off-planet, you have probably heard of the musical Hamilton. It received a record number of Tony nominations in 2016, winning 11 of the 16 awards for which it was nominated. The Grammy award for Best Musical Theater Album also went to Hamilton in 2016. Despite all of that hype, I knew little of the play other than the fact that it depicted the life of Alexander Hamilton. I never listened to the music as I was told it was "all rap and you won't like it."

As season ticket subscribers to the Fox Theatre, Hamilton was part of our series of shows for 2017-2018. For the first time ever, as subscribers we were not allowed to purchase any additional tickets for a play before tickets went on sale to the general public. For all other shows, we can pick up extra tickets if we want. We were not sure if we even wanted to see Hamilton, especially after we saw the tickets in the same row as ours listed on StubHub for $1,500 each. Wow! More than ten times the purchase price as we don't pay the listed price on the tickets as subscribers. I have to admit, we were tempted to put our tickets up as well. I am so grateful we did not do it.

Hamilton set

Someone suggested to us that we listen to the soundtrack of the show first, so I borrowed it from the library. That was a game-changer, for a number of reasons. First of all, we LOVED the music, even the hip hop and rap. Second, there is a lot going on with the music, and sometimes it was difficult to  understand what was being said. Having the lyrics printed out so we could follow along helped immensely. Finally, listening to the music a few times before seeing the show made it easier for us to follow along. Plus we could pay attention to the other actors on stage, the costumes, the choreography and the lighting since we didn't have to concentrate so much on the words.

Our tickets were for last night, and we knew there would be a crush of people jockeying for parking and entering the theater. We went early and easily found a parking spot on the street before heading to the Triumph Grill for an early dinner before the show. From the restaurant it's an easy walk to the Fox Theatre, where there was quite a crowd at the doors. The Fox recently added body scans with a wand to the purse checks, so it takes awhile to get people in. I think that is the only show we have attended at the Fox that was 100% sold out.

The energy in the theater was so different than we have ever experienced. Expectations were high, and the actors did not let the audience down. The crowd responded in kind, cheering, clapping and whistling after each song was completed. Everything about the musical was exceptional, and it was without a doubt the best show I have ever seen. Before the last note ended, the entire house was on its feet.

I'm so happy I didn't throw away my shot to see Hamilton.